When do you show your gratitude to someone? When do you say thanks, or doing something nice for another person?
What needs to happen to trigger this action in you? Is it a decision made by impulse, or more of a thought process, or both?
Impulsive gratitude is driven mostly by past experiences. You don’t really decide on thanking someone, it happens mechanically as programmed in your brain. This simplifies the daily decision-making process and frees up our mind to a more challenging task.
Oh-oh, does that imply, perhaps, that we don’t really care for showing gratitude to another person?
For example, paying for your coffee and thanking the cashier/waitress thereafter … Do you do it consciously? Or just something that you have been thought to do all your lives? What about those air stewards/stewardesses that worked hard to serve us during the whole flight journey? How do you respond to their services in whole?
I believe that the second connection to impulsive gratitude is the social and environmental construct of one self.
One idea that keep toying in my mind is the concept of a privileged society. The less privileged you are, the more you appreciate the smaller things. Your experiences of the world are out worldly, and almost everything you receive outside of your social and environmental construct is a positive appreciation. However, there’s always someone who is less privileged or more privileged than you, in the end, it is a matter of your perspective.
Impulsive gratitude does not have any emotional or growth impact in your life
Thought induced gratitude is driven by new experiences triggered by awareness. A person that exhibits awareness in his or her daily life is able to experience and appreciate situations, tasks or activities more engagingly, and in response, feel grateful and thankful for the learnings.
The good news is, we are all able to show gratitude as it is not a defined trait or state of being. Showing interest in being more grateful is a build of character strength and has a positive impact on your leadership and authenticity.
GRATITUDE is derived from the Latin gratia, meaning grace, graciousness, or gratefulness. All derivatives from this Latin root “have to do with kindness, generousness, gifts, the beauty of giving and receiving, or getting something for nothing” (Pruyser, 1976, p. 69). As a psychological state, gratitude is a felt sense of wonder, thankfulness, and appreciation for life. It can be expressed toward others, as well as toward impersonal (nature) or nonhuman sources (God, animals).– excerpts from Emmons and Shelton, from : the handbook of positive psychology (C. R. Snyder Shane J. Lopez, page 478)
Benefits of practising gratitude:
- Make you feel good about yourself
- Have a positive mental and physical effect
- Built trust and positive emotions in your social environment
- Build empathy to your society
- Increased optimism and happiness
How to build awareness and being grateful:
- Take some minutes daily in the evening to think about positive things that happened during the day, that you are grateful for.
- Have a gratitude journal to remind yourself of good moments that have happened in life.
- Speak with your loved ones on your thoughts, of what you do feel grateful for.
- Take a moment to thank those who have been in service for us during the day (Waiters, Taxi drivers, etc)
- Take a moment to realise that tomorrow is never granted.
Ps: Gratitude is now getting a great deal of attention as a facet of positive psychology. (www.psychologytoday.com)
Yaamuna Aldragen
Transitions and Problem Solving Coach
CPC, ELI-MP
Start with a New Vision, Succeed with a New Life
My mission is to lead individuals and corporations to remove resistance and inner blocks and provide them with valuable tools and insights to live, thrive and succeed in the life they dream of.
I work with individuals and organisations to find clarity in their visions while they are transitioning in any aspects of their life. I help you to realise and understand your personal values that are important to you, and how you can live, enjoy and be in control of your life by finding your true purpose and undiscovered potentials that lies within you by using tangible methodologies.
My passion is in enabling everyday leaders to find success in their field without compromising on their authenticity and passion.
I coach in 6 languages (English, Mandarin, German, Malay, Tamil, Kantonis).
More information regarding the author : www.yaamuna.com
