I met with some German tourists during my vacation last year. We had some good time exchanging thoughts, views and how much we were enjoying the weather. After a couple of hours and while we were starting to head our own ways, I suddenly heard the all too familiar comment from my new found acquaintances: Oh Gott I can’t wait to see the German officers at the airport welcoming us back to reality!
I know what they mean. There’s an incident happened many years ago just after a month I started working in Germany. It was a fairly normal morning; I greeted a colleague by the staircase then something strange happened: he asked my permission to speak further as he has something to say to me. I naturally complied and while we walked through the narrow corridor looking for a spot to speak, all I was wondering in my head, was questioning myself of what have I done now unknowingly that might have stirred this man up, on Monday morning no less!
We had to speak in English since I had close to zero knowledge of German language at this time.
So, the gentleman started by pointing out, that he has a problem with me. Ooopsy. Then he started to explain, that he has a problem with me smiling.
I looked at him, trying to think of how have I really offended him? By smiling? Is this some kind of German joke where the punch line a waits a second longer than normal? What did I do yesterday, or the day before, and the day before, that led to this confrontation today?
Well it wasn’t a joke. He went on telling me that he doesn’t understand why I smile when I greet people, or when I discuss about problems or technical details that need solving in team meetings.
He went on further clarifying, that he really don’t know how to respond every time I smile for everything. I apologised, and tried to let him understand that I am not a lunatic, I smile because I grow up in a culture that promotes smiling, and that smiling, is the cheapest yet priceless gift you can give to anyone. This discussion did not go well, because of my lack of German proficiency, and his passable English.
By the way, *Gift* means *Poison* in German
Coming back to the German tourists .. When you meet German tourist in any part of the world other than in Germany, they can be the friendliest ,happiest, smiley faces on earth. It is only when they come back to Germany that that know that they cannot keep up with the ‘hippiness’. Reality hits, and you know that it is time to be back to ‘behaving’ like a German. For foreigners like me back then, there was no German Cultural Vedas to follow. I learnt and made many notes.
According to the migration and migrant population statistics published by Eurostat, there are 22.3 million non-EU citizens living in the EU on 1 January 2018, representing 4.4 % of the total EU-28 population. The report also states that out of these numbers, there are an estimated 9.7million persons from a non-EU states are currently residing in Germany.
That is roughly about 1.2% of the total population of Germany. Where am I going with these numbers? All I am saying, is that there’s an extremely likely chance, you are going to interact, learn and experience German culture from all 4 corners of life while living in Germany. Even if it is a temporary expatriate position in your life, or a long-term residential place of your choice, it is essential to know and understand our host and future friends in Germany and aim for a holistic and joyful living condition throughout your journey here.
The attractiveness of Germany lies in the fact that it has a multi-faceted and complex cultural existence, with no obvious distinct features of diversity, not on the surface at least. It is like comparing an apple to another apple from the same tree. You can’t see much from the outside, but on the inside, they can be relatively different.
Wikipedia defines diversity as the degree of differences in identifying features among the members of a purposefully defined group such as racial, ethnic classification, gender, religion, gender identity genetic attributes, physical and mental health and many more.
As culture does not have a physical form, it takes me quite a while to grasp what is German culture. We are all too aware of the common ones, like the love of beer and Oktoberfest, the passion for German bread, Schweinehaxn, Applebäu, Birkinstock, Asparagus, Schwarze Trüffel, Christmas Market, Göethe, Bach, Black Forest, Brother Grimm, Albert Einstein, the love of cars and the unforgettable Krampus. On a day to day basis, we surely are not going to meet Mr. Krampus in the office, at least we all hope not. To experience Germany to its entirety, it is important to observe the small, detailed cultural behaviour that happens alongside us on a daily basis.
In this article, I would like to highlight 3 important cultural behaviour in Germany: German Language, Lifestyle and Common Sense.
German Language vs. Politeness
People say that the Germans are impolite. I have to say, I have seen such display sometimes in my years of living here, but only when Germans are conveying their messages in a foreign language.
Language drives culture. If you translate a paragraph word for word from German to any other language, you will miss out the essence of the conversation. For example:
‘I became a book’
Once I sat and watched a movie with my German friends. They love this movie so much that they watch it at least once, every year. We first watched it in English, and then we watched it together in German. To my horror, what seemed funny in English was not funny at all for my friends, and what they found as funny, I was not laughing. How awkward!
Similarly, politeness is usually conveyed in speech and conversation, that gets lost in translation. Also, the emphasis on politeness needs to be balanced with what is the core of the conversation.
A conversation is deemed to be polite when the speech takes a more indirect and circumlocutionary approach (Leech 1983, Lakoff 1973). For German speaker, politeness can be deemed as a waste of time, and a failure for not addressing the issue in hand. What this means is, Germans values the context of the speech more than being polite.
Another common confusion in German’s impoliteness is the lack of the word ‘please’ in a sentence. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), in a German sentence construction, the word ‘please’ can be implied and not mentioned. So, don’t take it personal when you don’t hear them!
This article from BBC news on 21st January 2009 paints an interesting picture about politeness, comparing between the Brits and the Americans:
‘Polite’ Britons died on Titanic
More British passengers died on the Titanic because they queued politely for lifeboats, researchers believe. A behavioural economist says data suggests Britons in that era were more inclined to be “gentlemanly” while Americans were more “individualist”. (complete article: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7843154.stm)
Lifestyle
Money Matters : Stability vs. Enjoyment
You can’t live on credit in Germany. Yes you can apply and get a VISA and MASTERCARD, but they are actually debit cards.
It tells you a little more about German’s view on life. You spend what you have, and you live within your means. Germans are mostly also great savers. In Germany, there are options to buy things at what you consider as price-worthy. You can get a furniture for hundreds of Euros, or you can also get them for 1€ or even for free, if you know where to find them.
There are many speculations of the origins saving mindset for Germans. What is the main driving force behind the saving culture? Is it the fear of the unknown? Or the notion of preparing for the future? The financial times have published an interesting article (march 22, 2018) and argued some excellent points on what could be a plausible reason for Germans to be obsessed with savings. https://www.ft.com/content/c8772236-2b93-11e8-a34a-7e7563b0b0f4
World’s first savings bank for ‘little people’ was established in Hamburg, Germany in 1778
Apartment Move
When I first relocated to my apartment in a small village down south, to my dismay, all the light bulbs have been removed. It was a Sunday and I couldn’t get any light bulb anywhere. I spent the night with my cell phone torch. What baffles me more, is that everything in the house has been removed, walls with new paint touch up, but oddly enough, the old shower curtain remains. My colleagues confirm that this indeed is the unspoken rule when you clean/clear your apartment for the next tenant.
When I was kind of ready with my apartment and organised a housewarming party, I felt truly honoured that I received a loaf of bread, 500g of salt, a dozen beer glasses, and a guidebook for roaming the city I was living in. Very practical, yet warm.
Personal and Work Separation
Another important cultural aspect to notice is how strictly Germans divide work and personal lifestyle. From what to wear at work, what to say and how to behave, they are clearly separated between work and personal life. This is a significant piece of information of how each and everyone’s role in the society play. The next time your German colleagues get confrontation with you, rest assured that it is only not a personal attack or bias, rather just a workplace conflict or issue.
Is it possible to separate work from personal life entirely? my experiences show that it is not that easy, even for our German counterparts. It is definitely wise to check in with each other on this topic, and avoid possible conflicts and miscommunications down the road.
Common Sense
The ‘ Know it All’ – Besserwisser
I don’t know any other languages that have that many ways to call a ‘know it all’ than in German. Duden online dictionary gives you at least 10 synonyms for ‘besserwisser’, and that is excluding the ones that almost every state in Germany have created in their own dialacts for their own versions of ‘know it alls’.
My ex-employer was building a house. I had a casual conversation with him, generally was just curious about the progress of his house construction. He immediately started to explain to me the details of the building regulations in Germany, including specific regulatory numbers, and for some reason, was very specific about the height of the staircases in his house, and why it should be exactly at the height measuring 17.5cm.
Precision is Norm
One fine night it snowed so heavily through the night. Excitedly I was having a small talk by the coffee machine at the pantry…
Me: There so much snow today morning when I woke up and I just had to go outside and play a little before coming to the office!
Mr.K: Hey that’s nice ! glad you enjoyed our weather. How much snow?
Me: What?
Mr.K: How much snow ?
Me: ermm.. like up to my knees? It was like A LOT …and amazing.. and magical ..
Mr.K: Ach.. to your knees ? You mean.. like 45.5centimeters?
What a total buzzkill. Incredible learning experience though.
We are living in an incredible era whereby interaction with people are more possible than ever. Learning each other’s culture creates an enriched lifestyle and a fascinating insights to human evolution. I urge us all to embrace the differences and share our uniqueness to people in our circle. You too, have an interesting story to tell.
Yaamuna Aldragen,
International Business Development Consultant, Transitions Coach
In part 2 of the article, I will share on the role of structure, identity and individuality in German culture and some tips of navigating through cultural differences in the workplace for foreigners.
